Just staring at one sleeping Sam...

I'm here in Raleigh, sitting on the couch with a sleeping Sam, watching the tube. It's so good to see her! She already has gotten a little bigger from living at Grandma's house, and she's very, very happy. I miss her so much, I've been dreaming about her almost every night since I came back to Boone. It's funny that I let myself get so attached to her, but not to my own friends. I know Sam loves me as much as her little heart can... but seeing how my friends love me is, well, something I can't even LET myself think about sometimes. I have all these silly views in my head of how I think people are and what they think about me, when I'm the one who is really all those things and I'm the one thinking all those thoughts about me. So when my friends actually treat me like a person whom they care about, it kind of messes with my head a little bit. Love is very hard to accept, I am really understanding that. I heard one time that when you cry, it is the Lord cleansing your mind, washing it. That really makes a lot of sense. When a friend treats me like a FRIEND instead of a burden, and somehow that wiggles its way into my head for once, it's a lot to take in. Thank you to everyone who has done this for me, even though I'm sure you never thought twice about it.